What can appear to be the straightest line, is often the most broken.

i'm so on top you look in control i've conquered mountains with strides to go i never fear and never sin the worst of you is the best in them did you ever judge or speak in vain? only the steps i took where in the Lords name! never was about whats right or wrong this is all a lie cigarettes and coffee couldn't hide I need something stronger i see it in your face poison apple in my fair tale take me away the kiss needed to drive me from sleep self medicate to try and match the feeling anything to feel as beautiful means justified by the reason love more lesser i'm loved and start to let go these are the words daddy couldn't understand at all my sons no faggot meetings with boys in unmentioned places who will carry on this family name? what will the neighbors think? the drugs don't work, but neither do we keep shuffling the problems just changes the order these are the words momma couldn't understand at all my daughters now slut starring at the party as a sure fire bet once that keg blows the boys come calling don't you feel so beautiful? the drugs don't work but neither do we keep suffling the problems just changes the order

I hope everything is allright with you. The way you sound is getting me worried. I hope you're ok and if something is going on you can talk to me. I'll do my best to heal your wounds. I do new things now. WRAP MY TROUBLES IN DREAMS. I find myself dreaming of us living together in a care-free enviroment. Where it's me and you with no worries about anything. That gets me by. Now i see you in a different light. I see clearly. Through the eyes of god, perfect reflection. I can see your true colors. BEAUTIFUL. From now on walk with your head up high because you are a god amongst lowly servants. man if i were half the person you were i'd be amazing just like you, but i'm not. I follow in your treads and hide behind your shadow. I wanna be like you. You are perfect. Sure at times you blow up but that's cause your human. Man if only you knew all the times that i've cried because i'm not something else, something more along the lines of you. I know this probably seems like a bunch of bullshit man, but i feel it in my heart like a knife. This is so true to me. I can look at myself and see faults,failure,ugly,sorrow. All the things you're not. Things happen to you and you'll find a way to turn that into a stepping stone to move foward. Things happen to me and it's a reason for me to move down 2 steps. Man you don't need help you need to teach people how to be like you. Starting with me. THE WORLD IS IN YOUR PALM. I just want to be by your side always and forever. Man i hate school and the idea of it but i wanna go to college so that i can be half of what you will become. I know if you put your mind to anything you can achieve that and much more. You put your mind into making me and you work and now look at us we are forever. And this is harder than anything than you can imagine but it'll work because we put our minds into this and look at us take FLIGHT!!! Honestly i don't know why i feel like showing you this. This is truly what i think of you. I'm the ugliest duckling on the inside man than that glorious day AUGUST 5TH 2004. I met a stunningly beautiful girl named elsa peralta.......since then i started taking form into what i am today. I'm forever in your debt. You don't see it man but I LOVE YOU. I'd die for you with a smile on my face and my heart in your hand because it's yours. I'm forever yours. Okay and this is my offical first letter to you. And sorry it's not a love letter but it's my thoughts about you with all it's flaws because i want you to read this. Because you can show me how much you love me now it's my turn. Things like this is the purpose of my journal. But i felt like i had to tell you this and i couldn't find the right words in person or over the phone. Sorry for being such a coward. Yeah i have a lot of problems......sure.....so fucking what. I also have a solution that must've been sent by god......AND THAT IS YOU. I love you so much. I'm sorry for not being better at times or whatever. From this moment on i will treat you like the queen you are. I love you bebby